Notes from a course with Merilyn Tunneshende

These are the notes I wrote soon after completing a short course with Merilyn Tunneshende in the UK. For those who have not heard of her, she is one of a bunch of people writing and/or giving courses on aspects of Toltequity, i.e. the traditions of ancient Mexico, particularly those brought to light by Carlos Castaneda. (Others whose work I know and respect in this field include Castaneda himself, Victor Sanchez, Ken Eagle Feather, Florinda Donner(-Grau), and Taisha Abelar)

Merilyn is a strange one (I hope she will forgive me writing this!). She is a very strong dreamer -- I can't emphasise the "very" strongly enough. Her dreaming energy infuses everything she says even when she is speaking in the real world, so you can have trouble distinguishing reality and dreaming even before she gets to work! People on a previous Merilyn course also reported very weird happenings in 'reality' (birds flying through the room, alarm bells going off, etc, etc), but things were a lot calmer on this particular course.

As with any sorcerer, you have to respect what you are dealing with, and once you know that, you can make good use of what they have to bring. Merilyn is the only big-name woman sorcerer I've done a course with, and probably the strongest dreamer, too. Put together 'woman' and 'high-powered dreamer', and you know you're in trouble!! ;-)

Anyway, here are the notes. I've edited out a few personal details, but it is basically unchanged.

BIG NOTE: The Fire Breathing technique you find here you will not find in Merilyn's book because she said you can get into trouble using this slightly more powerful form of the technique, so she omitted it. This is because if you get energy stuck somewhere, you can get into a lot of pain or other problems. To sort this out if it happens and you can't fix it yourself, you would need to find someone who understands energy circulation -- perhaps an accupuncturist or other Chinese medicine practitioner, or maybe someone very advanced in Tai Chi or Yoga. Really you should only attempt this exercise if you already have some experience with circulating energy -- for example the Microcosmic Orbit (from Chinese tradition). I'm no expert here, but I know enough to straighten myself out if I get in trouble -- but not everybody has been playing with energy techniques for ten years or more, so be careful!



                              12-15 July 1999

                          Grimstone Manor,  Devon



She did two little rituals with us, and got each of us to do it in turn
whilst the whole group watched.

The first was plucking fire from the candle flame, and consuming it.  She
demonstrated plucking the candle flame, and bringing the bit grabbed to her
nose to breath in.  Everyone in the group tried it, with various different
styles - including grasping the flame with the whole hand (Simon), and
people bringing the flame to their heart, or whatever.  She asked if we
could see the lines in the air.  This was the introduction to the Fire
Breath (indicating how we should sip the energy at the perineum).

The second ritual was something to do with connecting with either the fire
or copal - I'm not sure.  I think it was the fire.  She stood over a table
on which was a candle, and a pot burning copal.  She said "Inlakesh" (I am
you), with her right hand forward, over the table.  She said that you should
feel that you are absorbing energy from the fire at this point.  She then
said "Alakin" (You are me), her right hand back by her side, hand facing
forward and down.  She said that at this point you feel that energy is going
from you to the fire.

 Inlakesh - "I am you" - Hand forward above fire, open to receive
 Alakin - "You are me" - Hand back by side, open to give

I've been trying this idea (without the words) in a few situations to make a
connection - with the rock with the labyrinth symbols, and making love.


Okay, Merilyn's Fire Breathing technique.  [*** SEE BIG NOTE IN INTRODUCTION

Start with a sip from the original spark at the perineum.  This is the
original source, and it should not be abused - it is the seed of the whole

Use a front-of-nose inhaling breath, with pelvic tilting, and abdominal
contractions to bring the energy up from here, up the spine, to mid-shoulder
/ neck.  The shoulders move up/down.

From here, to get it up to the ear level, use a back-of-nose inhaling
breath, but keeping the lower movements going as well.  The shoulders are
used to flex the area between the shoulder blades, pulling up with each

When it is up to ear level, switch from an inhalation to an exhalation,
still connected with the abdominal contraction and pelvic motion.  The
exhalation comes from the gills around the rear base of the skull, and it
shoots up the nasal cavity and rattles the pineal gland like the rattle of a
rattle-snake.  The neck is bend slightly forward to stretch the neck, and
the shoulders roll forward with each exhalation.

When the pineal gland is buzzing, try to feel energy/opening in mid-eyebrow.
It is as if the snake comes up the spine, and its head bends over at the
top, showing the eye-marking on the back of its head at the mid-eyebrow.

From here, straighten the head slightly, and roll the eyes up as far as
possible towards the mid-eyebrow.  Two beams of intense light from the eyes
join at the mid-eyebrow/pineal gland to make a beam that burns out of the
top of the head.  Use the same exhalation, and feel the energy shooting out
of the top of the head like a geyser.  An opening is formed in the top of
the skull like a large clear lens, and liquid energy will start to flow in.

Up 'til now it has been fire energy - the fire comes up the back channel.
Now it is turning to water energy.

Put the tongue to the roof of the mouth, and drink the energy down with an
inhalation.  The inhalation draws the energy down to the heart.  The heart
is energized from front and back.  The energy is also drawn down into the
arms, making them feel warm and magnetic.

Next draw the liquid energy down to the diaphragm area.  With the
inhalation, the energy moves down to the diaphragm, and spins inwards, and
with the exhalation the energy spins outwards, and overflows to the other
organs, first to the liver and spleen, and then to the kidneys (the kidneys
are thumped with the fists).

From the kidneys, the buttocks and lower back are tensed (the lower back is
rounded), and the inhalation expands the energy in the kidneys, and the
exhalation triangulates down to the genitals.

From here, the inhalation expands the energy again, and the exhalation
pushes it forcefully back into the kidneys, packing it in.

Relaxing the intensity of the breathing now (all this breathing has been
very intense up 'til now), the energy is circulated and centred on the
centre of will (inch below navel, an inch inside).  Inhale and expand the
energy, then exhale and spin the energy in clockwise around the centre of
will - the hand may make clockwise circulations around the navel area to
help.  On the inhale, expand the energy just a little anti-clockwise - she
said not to pack the energy in too tightly.

From here, the energy may be rocked back and forth with wave-like motions of
the hips and lower back.  It is moved back and forth from the centre of
will, along a front-back channel, at the same level, all the way back to the

It may then be recirculated, using one or two of each type of breath all the
way around.  It is not necessary to go back to the perineum - this is the
original spark, and it should be used sparingly.

To keep the circuit flowing, she uses the pineal-mid-eyebrow breath.

Once the energy has been condensed into the front-back channel, and you are
ready to finish, you can find a point in that channel where the energy can
be held.  Once you find this, you can bring all the energy to that centre
with a quick sniff, and hold it there.

She was talking about the energetic process as follows.  The energy at the
perineum is the seed.  You never never give your seed away.  Instead you
take a little and grow a tree.  This is the energy circulating in the body,
and stored in the centre of will.  You never sell or give away your tree
either.  Instead you use it to get free energy from outside - the liquid
energy coming in through the top of the head.  This is the fruit from the
tree, and you don't give all this away either.  Instead you trade the excess
that you don't need for other things.  Trade some of these apples for
someone else's oranges or whatever.

If the energy kept at the centre of will is not left to drain away (from
having a weak will), this can be used to regenerate more energy using the
circuit, and there is rarely a need to go back to the original seed at the

For healing, she uses the pineal-mid-eyebrow breath in short bursts to pump
up the energy field until it there is good sensitivity (magnetic-type
effect) between the hands.  You can then feel this magnetic effect between
the hands and someone else's energy body.  Running your hands over the
person's energy body, you smooth it, looking for depressions.  The energy
field must be pumped up continuously.  Energy may be circulated in the
recipient's energy body with clockwise movements of the hands.  The
depressions in the recipient's energy body are filled with the overflow
energy from the pumping operations.  This is why it is necessary to keep
pumping - to keep the energy flowing and making new energy, so that the
fruit is used and not the tree.


More stuff on the Fire Breathing.  Working with fiery energy from the centre
of the earth:

Stand in a knees bent, legs apart stance, quite grounded.  Find the
connection between the centre of the earth, the soles of the feet and the
perineum.  Pull the energy up from the centre of the earth using the
perineum, as if pulling up a rope knot by knot.  The energy enters the soles
of the feet, and rises to the perineum.  It requires more work to move this
energy than working with our own energy - the earth is solid, full of iron
and rocks.  According to Merilyn: it takes some work to make her 'come' -
and like any woman, she doesn't respond to technique without any feelings!

The energy can then be pulled up the back in the same way as before.
However, to get it above neck level, it must be brought into the eyes.  The
eyes, stare, and you breath HHAAAA, mouth open, like a dragon.  Once the
eyes are ablaze, the energy is directed up to the top of the head as before,
eyeballs staring up to the pineal gland, the top of the head becoming open
like a clear glass lens.  Once this is done, the gill-like breath into the
back sinuses is used.

Bringing the energy down, it has a different feeling because it is earth
fire energy, and is more earthy.


Talking about the process of sleep.  In the first three hours, the energy
body stays within the physical body, making connections between the
blueprint and the physical body to get physical repairs underway, where-ever
it can.

After that time is complete, the body generates dreaming energy every 1:20
hours on average.  The energy body is healing stuff at an emotional level,
balancing the brain chemicals - it acts out things related to fragments of
the previous day or days in an attempt to clear or resolve them - this is
the automatic recapitulation that takes care of most of our daily stuff.
The body secretes a substance that paralyses our physical body whilst this
takes place.  Whilst in the dreams we believe them to be completely real -
we do not have the awareness that they are dreams until afterwards.

[It occurs to me that even without getting into *dreaming*, I could enhance
my body's natural recovery every night by sending energy to the sleep
process, feeling gratitude for it, or even sending Reiki/etc to aid it.]

The state of *dreaming* occurs when there is awareness in the dreaming
state.  This is the normal human state - she says that indigenous people
only have this state for dreaming - they do not know our 'unconscious'
dreaming.  They are brought up in an environment where people talk about
dreams with real knowledge of how they function.  However, we are brought up
with people with no knowledge or interest in dreams, and even negative
attitudes towards dreams, and at some point these attitudes penetrate us,
and we lose the natural ability, and start to dream without awareness.

When in *dreaming*, the energy body leaves the physical body behind, with
just enough to keep the vital functions going.  This is different to astral
projection, for example, where some part of the energy body leaves the body,
with a cord connecting it to the part that stays behind.  In *dreaming*, the
entire energy body leaves.

Eventually, she says it is possible for the physical body to be active at
the same time that the energy body is out in *dreaming*.  She says that
somnambulists have a natural advantage here.


Bridging is bringing energy or awareness from one side to the other -
between dreaming and physical reality.  Either finding something in
dreaming, and then creating it or finding it in physical reality, or
choosing something in physical reality, and then bringing it into dreaming.

Example things that may be bridged:
 - Energy
 - Awareness
 - Objects
 - Own self (!?)
 - People
 - Places
She was talking about bringing the self from one side to the other, but I
didn't really understand this bit - related to the double, perhaps?

She was also saying that once an object/place etc has been bridged, it
remains as a vortex that connects dreaming and physical reality - the
connection remains long after the object/whatever has gone.

Also, the more bridging you do, the wider the bridge becomes, and the easier
it is to bridge new things, more complex things or whatever.


She was talking about listening to other people's dreams - this was the
traditional arrangement for learning to dream.  The apprentice would each
day recount dreams to someone who had some understanding of the language of
dreams.  This had several effects.  One was to give importance to the dreams
- if there was a focus of telling the dream, then it was worth remembering
them.  Also, having someone give attention to something by listening
empowers that thing.


She describes the fully-lucid state of *dreaming* as a state surrounded by a
flowing undulating sea of dreaming energy.  Dream-objects appear out of this
sea of energy, and when they collapse, they return to this sea.  When you
awaken into *dreaming*, you realise that you can change anything at will, or
collapse the whole thing back to dream energy again.


A dreaming position for sleeping, that she says some people may find
helpful.  Lying on left side, left leg and arm extended down and up, head
resting on left arm, and right leg and arm bent in front.  The left
(receptive) side of the body sinks down into the ground from whence it may
receive energy.  As an alternative, the left arm may be brought in front of
the face.


We did two specific tasks on the first two nights.  The first night we all
came from the pool where they had filled the room with copal, and lit many
candles.  Our task was to get back into that room in dreaming, accepting
energy and help from the water.  She described raw, unfocussed, dreaming
energy as an expanse of waves of flowing energy around.  Things can be
created out of this energy, or may return to it when they are deconstructed.

Once in the night we had to get up, and physically return to the pool,
either to express gratitude for the help in achieving our task, or to
receive more energy in order to focus.  We were to sink into sleep repeating
our Intent for the night over and over.  There were to be two or three
rattles in the night, one after three hours, and another every two hours
after that.  At each of these we were to reassess our state, and reaffirm
our Intents, before either going back to sleep, or choosing to make the
physical journey.

The second night, our task was to go to the garden to the stream, and to
find some object there that we could then find again physically in the


Talking about working with Water as a spirit.  She says that there are three
mistakes to never make with water, or else you may lose its cooperation

- Never over-indulge emotionally - no wallowing in emotion.
- No drowning, or giving oneself up to the water entirely.  If you abandon
   yourself to the water, it engulfs you.
- Never dirty the water - don't dump bad energy into water.  Water may take
   bad energy away by grace, out of its own free will, but it will not
   tolerate being forced.
Talking about taking away doubts and fears.  She said the water may take
these away by grace, but these can be cast into the fire - perhaps the fire
is a better choice for this.

Talking about doing recapitulation with the presence of water or fire to
make it that much more powerful.


Something that she does with her recapitulation is this strong motion of
grabbing the event as soon as she finds it.  I was applying this by getting
a fleeting image, and grabbing it and taking it to my lower Tan Tien.  She
was doing a cutting, parting, grabbing motion, and pulling it to the place
where she felt that the physical connection was.


We were working trying to find the first time when our dreaming reality was
first 'penetrated' by an external invisible arrow.

An important new idea for me with her method of recapitulation was this idea
of marking an event as soon as you find it.  Her method is to call the
blocks from a particular age, starting at the present and working back year
by year, and as soon as something appears, to grab it, and pull it back to
the part of the body where she feels the associated sensation.  She does
three motions - cut, divide, grab - but that's just her particular style.

But anyway, I was trying this idea, and it was good - as soon as I started
to see something, I grabbed it and pulled it towards the navel.  

She said at that point, once the thing is grabbed, it is time to look for a
method of clearing it, and then in due course to enact that solution.

Her recommended system:

- Choose a single question to work with, and work through this question all
the way down without following any interesting/distracting side-tracks.

- Start at the current age, and work back year by year until the feeling
associated with the question is clear - i.e. before the block had been first

- Once a block has been found, mark it or grab it.  Now breath through it
(using a nasal breath, I think), until you know what it is, and it has been

- Once the energy is released from it, breath in the final glow of energy
from the embers of the event, and then sweep the ashes away to the left (or
right) with a sharp exhalation and turn of the head.

- Always act as an observer, and don't get involved

My method was different because I wasn't getting much in the way of
understandings or pictures.  So I was calling for blocks to my awareness in
dreaming at each specific age, and waiting for something to arrive.  As soon
as it arrived, I grabbed it and pulled it into my navel, and started
breathing.  When I felt like it, I would then do the normal sweeping breath
that I know (rather than the quick sweep), until I felt ready to go on.

I notice that when I am off in some event, my field of vision becomes almost
nothing, and by connecting back to my surroundings, I can judge how deep I
am in an event.  We were working next to the stream, and Merilyn suggested
letting the images touch the water, if you wished.  However, the water was
giving off strong enough energy anyway - it was helping a great deal.

Merilyn also suggested that it was possible to use fire as well to accompany
recapitulation, but she didn't specify how.

I worked on this idea of finding blocks to awareness in dreaming, and found
lots of stuff at age 29 - and then I was trying different ages, seemingly at
random: 4, 7, 0.  At zero I think I found this thing with the strange
creatures in Lapworth - I don't think I cleared it, although I got a load
out.  The water rushing nearby helped a lot.  I also tried in the womb, and
found something, but this seemed to be cleared quite easily.

Talking about IMPECCABILITY.  Defined it as putting your best effort forward
with humility.  The humility is connected with the fact that you are never
in a position to really judge whether your actions are good or bad, so all
you can do is offer what you have, with humility.

She told that long story about three people, just dead, bringing gifts to be
judged by God.  Each was given 24 hours to return to Earth to find their
gift to bring.  The first man was wealthy, and found the best pure gold
candelabra.  The second was miserable, and spent the time writing an apology
for all of his weaknesses in this life, all the things that he felt he could
have done better in.  The third was a young boy, and he had no wealth, and
no great life experiences - however he did have a collection of butterflys
that he had found dead, picked up and kept.  He picked the best of these to

Each brought their gifts one by one.  The rich man's candelabra was judged
as a Gift.  The miserable man's book was judged as an Effort.  The little
boy was afraid to present his gift, but when he did, a beam of golden energy
came down, and the angels lifted him off to heaven.  The two men could not
understand why their gifts had been rejected, and his accepted.

Merilyn was getting very emotional telling this story, holding back tears
(indulging?).  She said: "If you can understand why the little boy's gift
was accepted, then perhaps you can have the beginning of an understanding of


She was talking about ENTRAPMENT, by witches or whatever.  She said that a
really good witch does not put fears into you - instead she takes some part
of you and puts it in a bottle full of fears - containing it in fears.  The
trap is that each direction seems to have a fear connected with it.

She said there were three forms of control:
 - Penetration (by an invisible arrow, or whatever)
 - Binding (being bound by cords, or whatever)
 - Containment (trapped in some way)
Idea of having some part of you trapped in another realm - e.g. underworld.
The entrapment must be from one of these forms.


Talking about COPAL.  She said it was neutral and cleansing, feminine, and
very trustworthy and reliable.  The neutrality means that it does not
distort the picture, everything is as it is.  The trustworthiness means that
you can count on it to not do strange things in certain circumstances.  It
is used for cleansing and also to aid seeing the energy body.  It is a
spirit that aids in these processes.

Different types of COPAL:
 - White, most purifying
 - Gold, most spiritual
 - Red, earthy, connected with blood
 - Black, most earthy, purifying

There are other types of smoke that have particular uses.  For example,
tobacco is excellent for prayers, but it clings to certain forms of
negativity, rather than lifting them out.

She said that Frankincense is somewhat similar to copal, except that it is
no quite as neutral.


This meditative work that she was doing.  How to do healing and flying in
dreaming.  She said not to 'do' things, rather to absorb them.  So to heal,
she first got us to scan the body for places where the ringing of the
Tibetan bowl did not reach.  Then to see a garden where there was something
to heal this, and then to absorb this energy into that part of the body.

I had trouble with my heart and throat, and saw a garden with pink roses,
and I was absorbing pink energy into my heart.  She said that we could leave
this energy being absorbed constantly, even after we had come out of the
meditation.  Also, the energy we were absorbing was free energy (something
out of nothing), just like the free energy that splashes down in the Fire

For flying she said to absorb feelings into the body, such as the feeling of
having wings, or the feeling of flying, or the feeling of being very light.
She was saying: "Absorb the feeling of having wings", "Absorb the feeling of
flight", "Absorb the feeling of lightness".

For some reason I did not become a bird, rather I saw butterfly wings
forming.  I was above the garden at Coniston.  I seemed to have trouble
getting into that little body, but I did manage it, I think for a few
moments, but the sensation of flight was not terribly clear, and nor was the


Talking about LIMPIAS using copal.  This would often be accompanied by
prayers spoken very softly around the individual, plus other cleansing or
purification work preceding or following the cleansing with copal:

 - Energetic scanning using a Tibetan Bell, for example
 - Massage work (after the copal cleansing)
 - Listening to them (before)
 - Mildly scanning the body (before)
The Maya pray into the body (massaging the prayers into whatever part of the
body they apply to).  They also talk to the smoke, to the energy body, to
the elements, to forces, and to any other energies that were called upon.

Merilyn also spoke of always making connection with the person before doing
anything to them in a healing session - such as holding them by the
shoulders and looking them in the eye just before doing something (to get
their permission, non-verbally), or presenting the smoke (as below).  I'm
not clear, but I think the idea was something like letting the energy body
know what was coming.

LIMPIA process:

- Present the smoke.  This is to allow the recipient a moment to adjust
   before the healing starts.  The recipient may have eyes closed, or open.
- Divide the field into four (vertical strokes, then horizontal strokes)
- Trace the outside of the field
- Do a clockwise spiral up the front
- Start to comb / extend the fibres / smooth the aura / spiral up and down

This is also repeated at the back, and any of the movements above may be
used again at any time - after the initial pattern, the healing seems to go
into a period where the movement appears to be dictated by intuition, and
whatever the healer is detecting from the recipient's aura.

The whole healing is a flow.  She says not to exhaust them, and not to touch
them at all.  If the desire comes to touch them, then this is an indication
that it is time to move on to a different form of treatment, for example

She says that you want to see the field brighten, with the fibres
lengthening.  When you have finished, again present the smoke, and then back
off, and allow them time to absorb the healing, and to come back.  If they
fidget, give them some reassuring noise, and they will respond.

She says: Don't move the smoke - let the smoke move you.  Let the smoke be
more powerful than you.  Be gentle and wafting like the smoke.

For cleansing a house, circulate the energy through both dark places and
light places.  She said to get all the drawers and cupboards open - to get
the smoke into everywhere.

Go through the environment caressing it with the purifying smoke.  During
the cleansing, there is a three way relationship between yourself, the smoke
and the part of the environment being cleansed.

There are also rituals and techniques for longer periods of purification.
She talks of a process of 9 cleansings - either over 9 days, or once a week
over 9 weeks.  There may be several parts to each cleansing, for example:

 - Sauna, Sweat Lodge
 - Ritual bathing
 - Using Cedar, Sage, Frankincense, Copal
 - Energetic house cleansing, using copal and rose water
There would also be a dreaming complement to these physical actions.


When we were doing physical tasks in the night, this was the masculine side
of the practice - doing something physical, rather than the feminine actions
in dreaming.  One guy was complaining that the last night was not the same
because he didn't have a physical task to perform.  But he could have set
his own - somehow Merilyn had decided to leave it to us to set our own task
if we wished to - and only those with initiative did so (nobody?).  I felt
the same thing, though.  Her asking unusual things of us was challenging and
interesting - these were things I would not normally think of doing.  It's
not so much fun to think of your own ... !

She said that if doing physical tasks in the night appear to help in the
process of dreaming, then use them, and set yourself tasks.

These DREAMING tasks she suggests that we can do at home, before moving onto
more impressive things:

 - Bringing healing energy into the body
 - Bridging (objects etc both ways - this is a foundation task)
 - Flying / journeying
 - Purification
Doubling only comes when bridging is very strong.  All the bridging adds up
- the bridge becomes wider and stronger all the time.  In general, *allow*
things to happen in dreaming, rather than try to make them happen.

She said to use several alarms through the night.  First allow three hours
healing sleep, awake to the alarm, and go over the Intent for the night, or
do the physical component of the night's work.  Then allow 20-30 minutes
(generous) to get back to sleep, plus 1:20 hours or so for the dream cycle -
call this 2 hours.  Use the alarm to reaffirm the Intent, at whatever level
it enters awareness (it can work even if the alarm is heard and recognised
in the dream).  Falling asleep, repeat the Intent over and over.

Using the Fire Breath to generate dreaming energy - do it at least two hours
before sleeping, or otherwise it may be hard to get to sleep.  Do something
relaxing before sleep.  Use the dreaming position she showed us, if it works
for you.  Bear in mind that time of day may affect dreaming - if
mid-afternoon is a good time, or early morning, or whatever, use this time.

Use moving in darkness to enter a magical space - leave all the lights off,
and do things in the dark.  Position food, incense, whatever, so that they
can be found in the dark if necessary.

Ask for permission to dream from the space in which you dream - ask your
dreaming sanctuary for permission to dream.  This is an interesting idea,
and suggests working with the forces that you have brought into your
dreaming space, and perhaps more as well ...

Give gratitude for every dreaming experience, no matter how imperfect -
gratitude magnifies energy.  Treat the body with reverence, gentleness.

Talking about sleeping arrangements for couples.  Her idea is that each
should have a dreaming sanctuary of their own, decorated and arranged
exactly as they want it.  Then there should be a separate chamber dedicated
to romance and passion - another sacred space!

Make the sleeping space a beautiful space - not at all polluted.


The body never lies - the mind commonly deceives you.  The body never lies.

Idea of asking permission before taking objects.  For instance the guy asked
permission from the water to take the stones.  He was told, "Yes, take them,
but put them back afterwards".  If he didn't ask, he never would have known.
Another guy asked for permission to pick a flower, and he was told "NO"!

The mouse appeared for me yesterday.  Merilyn pointed out that it is very
fast, precise, working with a great deal of detail, sorting through things,
selective on a detailed level.  But there is also the feature of timidity,
which appeared for someone else as well.  The timidity is connected with my
fear of upsetting people.

Idea - become a different person in the day and in the night - allow the
mood of the day to be reflected in you as life, light, whatever, and the
night to be reflected as silence, sensuality, mystery.

Talking about sending the energy body ahead of the physical body, and
letting the physical body follow.  She was talking about preparing for a
workshop by thinking towards it, reading material about the place where it
would be, aiming towards it energetically.  Putting energy ahead into it
makes it much easier for the physical body to follow.

The Maya say that energy is attracted to:
 - Gratitude
 - Courage
 - Prayer
 - Offering
 - Eloquence

Feeling gratitude for something indicates to Spirit that you'd like more of
this kind of thing - the energy of that thing magnifies and grows.

She was talking about the heart connection.  She was saying that it was
better to have the heart and nothing else, than to have anything else
without heart.  She said don't let anyone trade it from you for anything.

I was making a connection between this and losing things that I enjoy -
things that my heart likes.  Thinking how easy it is to lose these things -
giving loads of space to problems, but little space to beauty and silence.
In a sacred space, these things will emerge spontaneously.  I need to make
sacred spaces, and protect them from others.  Things that I wish to keep
sacred, I must protect.

She was saying something like that it is no good escaping from one problem
to go into another.  You have to know where it is that you are going.  You
need impeccability and discernment - you need to choose the right thing out
of an infinite number of possibilities in this moment, and it may even be
that the correct thing to do in this moment is nothing, because the moment
for action has not yet arrived.

I asked if it was enough to trust your inner nature for the correct
direction.  She said something like that it is okay only with the aid of
impeccability, for example always keeping promises to others because if you
can't do that you can't keep promises to yourself either.  I'm not sure I
fully recorded her response to my question here.

My interpretation is to keep a good hold on my intuition.  But I also
remember all that thinking I did on the subject, when I decided that the
intuition and so on just respond to a direction given from above (from the
mind) - so still I have to decide on my direction, but once I am clear on
this, they will take care of the rest.

Idea of necessity for having fierceness to protect beauty.  This was an idea
of one of the guys on the course - he found a crocodile-head-shaped rock
from his dreaming.  I think the idea was that to keep sanctuary and beauty
you need an intense fierceness to maintain that space.


Kevin talking about Bob Monroe, in one of his books, talking about having
parts of himself scattered like dandelion seeds, as different lives in
different places, or whatever, and trying to retrieve these pieces.  Sounds

Someone saying that since the entire energy body leaves when going into
*dreaming*, if there are any fears about leaving the body behind, then this
will block getting into that state.  She was saying that you need to feel
that the body is in a safe place, and you need to have no fears that
something bad will happen to the body.  The fears may come from past
experiences, or whatever.

A note that the Fire Breath energy circulation can be used from within
dreaming, only in this case it is much easier - the energy follows the

A saying about the Raven (from Merilyn) - the Raven steals a piece of the
Sun to bring to man.

Someone complained about a nightmare from the night before in which lots of
black insects were eating their way through the metal of her bath, just
under the enamel.  She received the intuition that this could be healed by
fire.  When she awoke, she tried showering, or swimming or whatever (using
water).  Merilyn gave her a candle when she described the problem.  The idea
was basically a "Plague of Pestilence", which she healed using fire.

Talking about the idea of needing to bridge the vision in order to get the
power of it.  The thing found in the dream needs to be created or found in
the physical world before its power can be used.  

She was talking about shamanic power songs that are bridged from a dream
into the physical world.  These songs are often in a language known to
no-one, and the meaning comes to the shaman as he learns about the gift -
only the shaman can know what this means, as it is his song.  The song could
be sung by another person, but it would not have the same effect, as they do
not have the dream-version that this is a bridge to.  The song is a vortex
for the shaman - it is a bridge into dreaming.

She was talking about the challenge of finding something in dreaming, and
then undertaking the task of learning how to use it.  The shaman receives
the song, and then gains an understanding of the meaning, and how to use it,
and what it is for.

It is also possible to bridge a song or some other thing that can be passed
onto others.  In this case it will work for others once it has been passed
on, according to the information and knowledge that comes with it.

Thinking about Reiki in these terms, then all the symbols and attunements
are items bridged from dreaming.  Their power comes through the bridge
between the symbol and the dream it connects to.  The attunements are
special sequences whose powers are to setup the dream-bridges for the
healing processes and symbols in the initiate - to pass on all these
dream-connections to someone else.


I'm finding all kinds of connections between water, dreaming and death.  The
feeling I'm finding for Fire is life.  For Water is peace, quiet, condensed.
For Earth is nurturance.  For Wind is movement, change.

Water seems to be connected with dreaming in the sense that she described
the dreaming energy as something undulating and flowing around, and used the
swimming pool and water to help us find this.  To me the feeling I'm finding
from her description is not quite as heavy as water, but dense and
undulating all the same.

She said that the only other states that are comparable to Dreaming are deep
Yogic trance, coma and death.  In Osho's book, he says that when one is able
to take awareness into the sleep-state, you find that it takes the feeling
of death.  The water-feeling I found is quiet, still, at peace.

So it seems to me that there *is* a connection between water and death after


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